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The Garden We Can Grow : What We Can and Cannot Control


Seedling growing in soil with a cartoon fox. Text: "A gardener's strength is found in nurturing... trusting growth to follow. You are a gardener."

The Garden We Can Grow : What We Can and Cannot Control -

There are some things in life we can control, some things we can nurture, and some things we cannot change.


We can control our thoughts, emotions, and actions. We can nurture our health, our schedule, and our kindness toward others. But we cannot control the past, the future, or the choices other gardeners make.


At the center of our garden are the seeds we can grow every day:

  • My thoughts — choosing a positive thought when a negative one creeps in.

  • My emotions — noticing how I feel and identifying it, instead of letting it take over.

  • My actions — taking steps that reflect my values and help me grow stronger and calmer.

  • My self-care — resting, eating well, or doing something creative that restores me.

  • My treatment of others — choosing words and actions that plant seeds of kindness and respect.

Around that circle are the parts of life we can nurture, even if we don’t fully control them:

  • My schedule — I can make space for the things that matter.

  • My health — I can support my body with movement, hydration, and care.

  • My kindness toward others — I can choose kind words and actions that plant seeds of respect.

  • My finances — tending to how I save, spend, and share.

And then there are the forces outside our reach. No gardener can control:

  • The past and the future — focusing on what cannot be changed or trying to control what hasn’t happened yet.

  • Other gardeners’ actions — what someone else chooses to say or do.

  • The weather — sunshine, rain, and changing seasons we we grow through.

  • World situations — the larger events and circumstances beyond our control.


Things I can and cannot control poster with free printable-Circular diagram with a fox in center, labeled "The Garden I Can Grow." Surrounding text includes emotions, choices, and health. Clouds read "The Weather" and "World Situations."
Click the poster to download the pf version to hang in your home, office or classroom!

This poster and mindset is a daily reminder that when we focus on the thoughts, actions, and choices we can control, we feel stronger and more grounded.


✅ We feel calmer and less overwhelmed

✅ We build stronger roots of resilience

✅ We put more energy into what helps us grow

✅ We spend our time tending to what matters most

✅ We direct our care toward what is within our reach

✅ We grow stronger by choosing where to place our energy

Wood-framed sign with bead art spelling "pull weeds." Text reads: "When the smallest things come together... You are a gardener." Fox drawing below.

🌸 A Gardener’s Tool in Action


Hey gardeners, check out our recent post on choosing Perler beads as a powerful gardening tool to help us take control and evoke feelings of calm, boost our confidence, and invite creativity and connection. Each tiny bead is a reminder that small, intentional actions can grow into something beautiful.


Taking time to place each bead is a choice we can control, and it gives gardeners of all ages a moment to slow down, focus, and create.



Circular diagram titled "The Garden I Can Grow" with sections on emotions, choices, health, and more. Orange border with teal text. You are a gardener movement-collect gardening tool badges- aka coping tools and skills for all ages

👉 Don’t forget to collect your Gardening Tool Badge for this activity! Add it to your Gardener Tool Collector Sheet as a reminder that focusing on what we can grow is one of the most powerful tools we have.


This Gardening Tool Badge represents the practice of focusing on what we can control. It reminds us to stay rooted in our thoughts, actions, and choices, rather than getting pulled into what’s beyond our reach.

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Fox near a garden with fence and vegetables. Text: "The Garden We Can Grow: What We Can and Cannot Control. Guide to nurture. youareagardener.com/pullyourweeds"


When we focus on what we can grow and nurture, we strengthen our roots and create more space for calm, confidence, and connection. Life will always bring forces outside our reach, but our greatest growth comes from tending to the soil right in front of us.


By staying rooted in this mindset, gardeners of all ages can keep planting seeds of resilience and watching their gardens bloom.



You are a gardener.




You Are a Gardener® Children's Book
$17.99
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Discover The Garden We Can Grow by focusing on what we can control, nurture, and release, helping gardeners of all ages stay rooted in emotional growth and resillence.

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You Are a Gardener® is a movement dedicated to spreading seeds of positive change by nurturing emotional growth and resilience. Through our book, inspiring school assemblies, and the #PullYourWeeds® Blog, we provide tools to help gardeners of all ages turn life’s “weeds” (challenges) into “seeds” (opportunities for growth). Our blog offers engaging activities, mindfulness tips, and creative strategies to cultivate confidence, creativity, and calm every day. By fostering a mindset of positivity and self-awareness, You Are a Gardener® empowers families, educators, and communities to bloom together. 🌱✨
flowers@youareagardener.com

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